Wedding etiquette, what shall we do?

[crafters_corner]

Sadly, this is the downside of covid, and families being divided over it.

It is an odd situation, with your husband going to his Mums house where the wedding is going to be, and setting up the livestream, then having to leave it. I think I might feel quite put out by that as well.

About the present, I'm of the mind, that two wrongs don't make a right. If you didn't buy them a gift, then they might feel hurt about that, so it's then a lose-lose. I think that I'd have to buy them something still, just so that you feel like you've done the right thing. It is a gift that you are giving, to celebrate their marriage, and you are family still, no matter what.

What does your husband think about the gift giving??

I haven't discussed it with him. But this prompted me to look at the invite. It is a wishing well anyway, which makes sense as they already live together, and no doubt have plenty of everything.

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Yep, not much you can do about this, they obviously want the mother and sister there, so they are doing the right thing and abiding by the rules, you should probably be happy about that... 

Personally I would just accept this but given there has been a cost to you and your family I would just buy them a modest present... maybe also send along a message to be read with a subtle dig , something like "love to have joined you in celebrating your special day, but we do understand it is more important that the brides unvaccinated family be allowed to attend."

Omg! Lol. Could never send a message like that! Classic.

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OP, are you not vaccinated? Not trying to be personal, but I read your post again, and wondered why your husbands sister is going, but he's not (and you and your kids)

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So sad to hear that hunni. Our families can hurt us, like no one else can.

Yes, I am fully vaccinated. We all are . My sister in law is going because she is taking the service - they can't get married without her. She doesn't even want to do it now, she told me.

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Nope no present and if they feel hurt by this just let them know how hurt you guys are having been uninvited, tell hubby not to set up the live stream, why should he? 
And you say the reception is to be held at a local venue, surely they wont be able to get in without being scanned?

 No need to scan if numbers are kept under a certain number, it is a local club hall.

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Thanks all, for your opinions. Will discuss with husband, invite says they will have a Wishing Well. So that has thrown me.

Seeing as it is a wishing well, then I guess you could get away with not putting $$$ into it, so no one would know whether you have or not. In that case, just do what you feel is right for you and your family. Think about, how you might feel if you don't, and if you did, would you be annoyed about it, and regret it.

As they are a couple who are already living together, I'd probably only put $5.00 in the pot. Way less that you're spend on a present.